"Alright, Burnie. What's this great new idea?"
"Okay, so, you know that private deserted island nation I bought?"
"Of course."
"Right, so we scatter weapons and stuff all over the place then drop all the Let's Play guys on it and force them to try and slaughter each other for survival!"
"You mean like for an episode of Immersion?"
"..."
"Burni-"
"Yes. Of course! Immersion. That's totally what I was talking about."

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2017-08-12_NO_PANTS_PARTY_-_PUBG_Gameplay_with_Let_s_Play_[onmtdEGFfdE].description

2017-08-12_NO_PANTS_PARTY_-_PUBG_Gameplay_with_Let_s_Play_[onmtdEGFfdE].info.json

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2017-08-12_NO_PANTS_PARTY_-_PUBG_Gameplay_with_Let_s_Play_[onmtdEGFfdE].webm

NO PANTS PARTY - PUBG Gameplay with Let's Play

I just asked Jacob how many Jedi he could name from the Battle of Geonosis. He calmly took off his headphones, closed his eyes, and started silently ticking off names on his fingers. I've never seen him so serious or pensive in all my life. Take a guess and place your bets. The results will be in the description for CLONE DRONE IN THE DANGER ZONE Part 2, one week from today!

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2017-08-11_ATTACK_OF_THE_DRONES_-_Clone_Drone_in_the_Danger_Zone_Gameplay_Part_1_[2bI-v5dMnBY].description

2017-08-11_ATTACK_OF_THE_DRONES_-_Clone_Drone_in_the_Danger_Zone_Gameplay_Part_1_[2bI-v5dMnBY].info.json

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2017-08-11_ATTACK_OF_THE_DRONES_-_Clone_Drone_in_the_Danger_Zone_Gameplay_Part_1_[2bI-v5dMnBY].webm

ATTACK OF THE DRONES - Clone Drone in the Danger Zone Gameplay Part 1

"What's the point of all this? Each day is more empty and tedious than the last. The most vicious among us thrive as fools attempt to nurture what little goodness remains. We struggle to find meaning in banal carnal pleasures while an indifferent world mocks our collecti-"
"Just blow out your damn candles, Adam. The rest of the kids want some cake."  

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2017-08-11_EVERYBODY_DIES_-_Funhaus_Comments_83_[Yc5J4J8Pbbc].description

2017-08-11_EVERYBODY_DIES_-_Funhaus_Comments_83_[Yc5J4J8Pbbc].info.json

2017-08-11_EVERYBODY_DIES_-_Funhaus_Comments_83_[Yc5J4J8Pbbc].jpg

2017-08-11_EVERYBODY_DIES_-_Funhaus_Comments_83_[Yc5J4J8Pbbc].webm

EVERYBODY DIES! - Funhaus Comments #83

I was having a real fun time with this description until I looked up Benson Willems on Twitter and discovered that I have less of an online presence than a eunuch with no thumbs, crippling anxiety, and Lupus.

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2017-08-10_READY_PLAYER_DOG_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[AXOyx5QM0fA].description

2017-08-10_READY_PLAYER_DOG_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[AXOyx5QM0fA].info.json

2017-08-10_READY_PLAYER_DOG_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[AXOyx5QM0fA].jpg

2017-08-10_READY_PLAYER_DOG_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[AXOyx5QM0fA].webm

READY PLAYER DOG - GTA 5 Gameplay

According to an article I just made up, sixty-eight percent of women don't even mind dating a man with E.D. I myself have done just fine over the years using a precise system of focused, intensive foreplay and apologies.

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2017-08-10_DR._MANHATTAN_EXPRESSWAY_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[RcxzPswLZNc].description

2017-08-10_DR._MANHATTAN_EXPRESSWAY_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[RcxzPswLZNc].info.json

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2017-08-10_DR._MANHATTAN_EXPRESSWAY_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[RcxzPswLZNc].webm

DR. MANHATTAN EXPRESSWAY - GTA 5 Gameplay

Check out this week’s menu and get your first three meals free, with free shipping, by going to http://www.blueapron.com/soup
And get 15% off today, with free shipping and free returns, by going to http://www.mvmt.com/dudesoup

This week that gang debates the merits of different DLC and loot systems as well as:
9:15 - Having pets vs children
49:45 - Weird trends in movies
56:30 - A very heated installment of Hard Nettin'
1:08:00 - Benefits of joining Rooster Teeth First

Want more Dude Soup? Check out the Post Show: http://funhaus.roosterteeth.com/show/fan-show

SOURCES:
[Shadow of War Forum] Introducing the Market: https://community.wbgames.com/t5/Official-Announcements/Introducing-the-Market/m-p/1611183
[Eurogamer] Shadow of War has a ranked online mode: http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2017-08-07-shadow-of-war-has-a-ranked-online-mode

HARD NETTING:
Knuckle's Family Tree - https://m.imgur.com/Lfn4jil
Who wins? VOTE HERE - http://www.strawpoll.me/13653066

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2017-08-09_DLC_GONE_TOO_FAR_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_134_[IsPB_l1NZYU].description

2017-08-09_DLC_GONE_TOO_FAR_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_134_[IsPB_l1NZYU].info.json

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2017-08-09_DLC_GONE_TOO_FAR_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_134_[IsPB_l1NZYU].webm

DLC GONE TOO FAR? - Dude Soup Podcast #134

Open Haus is sponsored by Blue Apron! Go to http://www.blueapron.com/openhaus and get your first 3 meals free with free shipping.

To be honest, I was only 9 when the 90s ended, but does anybody remember Fruitopia? 'Twas the nectar of the gods, yet every time I speak of it, people become distant and abruptly end the conversation. Does nobody yearn for the divine taste of a cold "Strawberry Passion Awareness or a Raspberry Psychic Lemonade?

Ask us questions here!
http://www.reddit.com/r/funhaus

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2017-08-08_WE_LOVE_THE_NINETIES_-_Open_Haus_129_[pFEVHhmCImg].description

2017-08-08_WE_LOVE_THE_NINETIES_-_Open_Haus_129_[pFEVHhmCImg].en.vtt

2017-08-08_WE_LOVE_THE_NINETIES_-_Open_Haus_129_[pFEVHhmCImg].info.json

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2017-08-08_WE_LOVE_THE_NINETIES_-_Open_Haus_129_[pFEVHhmCImg].webm

WE LOVE THE NINETIES? - Open Haus #129

I took a trip to the official Warner Bros Space Jam website for some description material. I clicked on a green planet labelled "Jump Station" and found this actual message: 

"Well, we've got no idea how you got here, but you've discovered a now-empty page of information. Congratulations. Now please go somewhere else. Thank you."

You're welcome, Space Jam. You're welcome.

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2017-08-07_SPACE_JAMMED_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[U8rYxGy4B1A].description

2017-08-07_SPACE_JAMMED_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[U8rYxGy4B1A].info.json

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2017-08-07_SPACE_JAMMED_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[U8rYxGy4B1A].webm

SPACE JAMMED - Demo Disk Gameplay

The following real 1980's wrestling promo has been brought to you by Cocaine:
"But if you look in their eyes, man, have you seen the fear in all those little Hulksters? They realize that when I get Andre the Giant cinched up in the launch position, when I SLAM him through the Trump Plaza, brother!---from New York, down to Tampa, Florida, the fault line is gonna break off! And as Andre the Giant falls into the ocean!---as my next two opponents fall to the ocean floor and I pin ‘em, so will DONALD TRUMP and ALL THE HULKAMANIACS! But as Donald Trump hangs on to the top of the Trump Plaza, with his family under his other arm, as they SINK, to the BOTTOM OF THE SEA---THANK GOD Donald Trump’s a Hulkamaniac! He’ll know enough to let go of his materialistic possessions, hang on to the wife and kids, DOG PADDLE with his life all the way to safety! But Donald, if somethin’ happens, if you run outta gas, and all those little Hulkamaniacs, just hang on to the LARGEST BACK in the world, and I’ll dog paddle us, backstroke all of us to safety!"

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2017-08-06_CAGED_BEASTS_-_WWE_2K17_Gameplay_[46cBkItNe7o].description

2017-08-06_CAGED_BEASTS_-_WWE_2K17_Gameplay_[46cBkItNe7o].info.json

2017-08-06_CAGED_BEASTS_-_WWE_2K17_Gameplay_[46cBkItNe7o].jpg

2017-08-06_CAGED_BEASTS_-_WWE_2K17_Gameplay_[46cBkItNe7o].webm

CAGED BEASTS - WWE 2K17 Gameplay

"Captain Picard, The Borg have breached the hull! What do we do?"
"Set the holodeck for the old west!"
"... uh."
"The roaring twenties?"
"Why would we go t-"
"Oh! That Sherlock Holmes one!"
"Captain, I d-"
"Look, Number One, I'm just trying to keep everyone from masturbating in it. The custodial staff is ready to shoot me out of the airlock."
 
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2017-08-06_WORK_ON_YOUR_CORE_-_Star_Trek_Bridge_Crew_Gameplay_Part_2_[PgVct1fCNd8].description

2017-08-06_WORK_ON_YOUR_CORE_-_Star_Trek_Bridge_Crew_Gameplay_Part_2_[PgVct1fCNd8].en.vtt

2017-08-06_WORK_ON_YOUR_CORE_-_Star_Trek_Bridge_Crew_Gameplay_Part_2_[PgVct1fCNd8].info.json

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2017-08-06_WORK_ON_YOUR_CORE_-_Star_Trek_Bridge_Crew_Gameplay_Part_2_[PgVct1fCNd8].webm

WORK ON YOUR CORE - Star Trek Bridge Crew Gameplay Part 2

This podcast is sponsored by Mack Weldon. Go to https://www.mackweldon.com and get 20% off using promo code “filmhaus”.

Today, the gang talks about the zenith of American film making, The Emoji Movie. And yes, I did scoff at the reviews while simultaneously sending a kissy face followed by three blue hearts and a hot dog to my girlfriend.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/filmhaus-podcast/id1195978256?mt=2

https://play.google.com/music/listen?u=1&pageId=102780502325951638702#/ps/Ic24v4be3tpgwqfd6hbrdxji4ty

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2017-08-05_Emoji_Movie_is_What_s_Wrong_with_Hollywood._-_Movie_Podcast_[F5XzP9pIexQ].description

2017-08-05_Emoji_Movie_is_What_s_Wrong_with_Hollywood._-_Movie_Podcast_[F5XzP9pIexQ].info.json

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2017-08-05_Emoji_Movie_is_What_s_Wrong_with_Hollywood._-_Movie_Podcast_[F5XzP9pIexQ].webm

"Emoji Movie is What's Wrong with Hollywood." - Movie Podcast

Okay, technically it's a some kind of fort or prison, but what does it matter when trust is being tested within the weathered brick of its walls!

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2017-08-05_CASTLE_SLASHERS_-_Gmod_Murder_Gameplay_Part_2_[J5jNTxIWqWU].description

2017-08-05_CASTLE_SLASHERS_-_Gmod_Murder_Gameplay_Part_2_[J5jNTxIWqWU].en.vtt

2017-08-05_CASTLE_SLASHERS_-_Gmod_Murder_Gameplay_Part_2_[J5jNTxIWqWU].info.json

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2017-08-05_CASTLE_SLASHERS_-_Gmod_Murder_Gameplay_Part_2_[J5jNTxIWqWU].webm

CASTLE SLASHERS - Gmod Murder Gameplay Part 2

Take heed, viewers. Learn the lesson that these hapless Nazis could not. There's nothing more deadly than a stalwart, wheelchair-bound American wielding a pair of Nazi robot death lasers.

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2017-08-04_WHEELCHAIR_ASSASSIN_-_Wolfenstein_2_Gameplay_[0DjX8MlJCxk].description

2017-08-04_WHEELCHAIR_ASSASSIN_-_Wolfenstein_2_Gameplay_[0DjX8MlJCxk].info.json

2017-08-04_WHEELCHAIR_ASSASSIN_-_Wolfenstein_2_Gameplay_[0DjX8MlJCxk].jpg

2017-08-04_WHEELCHAIR_ASSASSIN_-_Wolfenstein_2_Gameplay_[0DjX8MlJCxk].webm

WHEELCHAIR ASSASSIN - Wolfenstein 2 Gameplay

We know you're out there, Frank Marshall. We know that you're watching, and we know that you've got Congo deleted scenes hidden under your floorboards. You'd better believe it, buster. We'll findja, we'll stick a crowbar under your rug and, by golly, we'll see a gorilla shoot a gosh dern laser beam.

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2017-08-04_WE_HATE_MOVIES_-_Funhaus_Comments_82_[e3_CMB6v2Tk].description

2017-08-04_WE_HATE_MOVIES_-_Funhaus_Comments_82_[e3_CMB6v2Tk].info.json

2017-08-04_WE_HATE_MOVIES_-_Funhaus_Comments_82_[e3_CMB6v2Tk].jpg

2017-08-04_WE_HATE_MOVIES_-_Funhaus_Comments_82_[e3_CMB6v2Tk].webm

WE HATE MOVIES? - Funhaus Comments #82

"Psychological impotence is where erection or penetration fails due to thoughts or feelings (psychological reasons) rather than physical impossibility; this is somewhat less frequent but can often be helped. Notably, in psychological impotence, there is a strong response to placebo treatment. Erectile dysfunction can have severe psychological consequences as it can be tied to relationship difficulties and masculine self-image."

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2017-08-03_WUSSY_WATCHMEN_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[7UO-VjsaPP8].description

2017-08-03_WUSSY_WATCHMEN_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[7UO-VjsaPP8].info.json

2017-08-03_WUSSY_WATCHMEN_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[7UO-VjsaPP8].jpg

2017-08-03_WUSSY_WATCHMEN_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[7UO-VjsaPP8].webm

WUSSY WATCHMEN - GTA 5 Gameplay

You came for some good ol' fashioned Grand Theft Auto? Sorry, buckeroo. It's time you got a proper education on the anatomy of the human female. Lucky for you, there are three trained professionals here to take you on a journey.

Climb to the Top -- https://socialclub.rockstargames.com/games/gtav/pc/jobs/job/vpV8i1smVESLla-2iBidJg#

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2017-08-03_STENCH_TRENCH_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[CFbhw7SsRKI].description

2017-08-03_STENCH_TRENCH_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[CFbhw7SsRKI].info.json

2017-08-03_STENCH_TRENCH_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[CFbhw7SsRKI].jpg

2017-08-03_STENCH_TRENCH_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[CFbhw7SsRKI].webm

STENCH TRENCH - GTA 5 Gameplay

Get your first Dollar Shave Club Box for only $5 at http://www.dollarshaveclub.com/dude
And get your Stitch Fix at http://www.stitchfix.com/dudesoup and receive 25% off when you keep all 5 items in your box!

Famed TV Production Assistant, Joel Rubin, joins us as we talk about:
2:46 - Our future children/not children
13:03 - Identifying with the audience
23:22 - Joel writing for Disney
48:11 - Mind Freak: Real life questing
53:50 - Hard Netting

Want more Dude Soup? Check out the Post Show: http://funhaus.roosterteeth.com/show/fan-show

HARD NETTING:
Ivan Dorin: https://www.youtube.com/user/shotztoxic
Passion Dust: https://www.prettywomaninc.com/

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http://twitter.com/joelrubin_

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2017-08-02_JOEL_NEEDS_A_JOB_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_133_[C29nHldoaHs].description

2017-08-02_JOEL_NEEDS_A_JOB_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_133_[C29nHldoaHs].info.json

2017-08-02_JOEL_NEEDS_A_JOB_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_133_[C29nHldoaHs].jpg

2017-08-02_JOEL_NEEDS_A_JOB_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_133_[C29nHldoaHs].webm

JOEL NEEDS A JOB? - Dude Soup Podcast #133

Ask us questions here!
http://www.reddit.com/r/funhaus

Whenever I get wistful for my old college dorm days I'll just crack a warm Natty Ice, stalk women on MySpace, and masturbate under a blanket in a room full of people I hate.

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https://twitter.com/CrikMaster

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2017-08-01_COLLEGE_LIFE_SUCKS_-_Open_Haus_128_[Y7jcLE748PY].description

2017-08-01_COLLEGE_LIFE_SUCKS_-_Open_Haus_128_[Y7jcLE748PY].info.json

2017-08-01_COLLEGE_LIFE_SUCKS_-_Open_Haus_128_[Y7jcLE748PY].jpg

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COLLEGE LIFE SUCKS? - Open Haus #128

They'll let celebrities get away with anything as long as they can dance. Chris Brown beat the holy christ of Rihanna, Michael Jackson got to diddle all those kids, and they barely bat an eye when Channing Tatum torched that hospital full of war orphans.  

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2017-07-31_DIRTY_DANCING_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[TZjRg464lsc].description

2017-07-31_DIRTY_DANCING_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[TZjRg464lsc].info.json

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2017-07-31_DIRTY_DANCING_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[TZjRg464lsc].webm

DIRTY DANCING - Demo Disk Gameplay

"Well, Jim, according to these readings you've contracted Bajoran Chlamydia, Romulan Herpes, Ferengi Papilloma Virus, Borg Crabs, Cardassian Gonorrhea, and AIDS."
"... Like, 'Space AIDS' or 'Vulcan AIDS' or something?"
"No. Just regular AIDS."
"Shit."

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2017-07-30_BOLDLY_GOING_NOWHERE_-_Star_Trek_Bridge_Crew_Gameplay_Part_1_[7U8mGxWogB8].description

2017-07-30_BOLDLY_GOING_NOWHERE_-_Star_Trek_Bridge_Crew_Gameplay_Part_1_[7U8mGxWogB8].info.json

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2017-07-30_BOLDLY_GOING_NOWHERE_-_Star_Trek_Bridge_Crew_Gameplay_Part_1_[7U8mGxWogB8].webm

BOLDLY GOING NOWHERE - Star Trek Bridge Crew Gameplay Part 1

It's the match-up you've all been waiting for: The winner of Most Popular Wrestler 2006, Comeback of Year 2015, and three WWE Tag Team Championship titles vs "That guy who yells a lot about stuff on that one YouTube channel where they play video games, kind of"!

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2017-07-30_XAVIER_WOODS_VS_THE_TROLL_-_WWE_2K17_Gameplay_[IBauSeDKb38].description

2017-07-30_XAVIER_WOODS_VS_THE_TROLL_-_WWE_2K17_Gameplay_[IBauSeDKb38].info.json

2017-07-30_XAVIER_WOODS_VS_THE_TROLL_-_WWE_2K17_Gameplay_[IBauSeDKb38].jpg

2017-07-30_XAVIER_WOODS_VS_THE_TROLL_-_WWE_2K17_Gameplay_[IBauSeDKb38].webm

XAVIER WOODS VS THE TROLL! - WWE 2K17 Gameplay

The 90's sucked. Everybody was so scared of AIDS that they just buried themselves in flannel, denim, and body hair and refused to have sex anyone without notarized blood test results in their wallet. And don't forget, a baggie of clean blood was REALLY expensive back then!

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2017-07-29_DOOMED_TO_FAIL_-_Strafe_Gameplay_[ssxNqBPRL6Y].description

2017-07-29_DOOMED_TO_FAIL_-_Strafe_Gameplay_[ssxNqBPRL6Y].info.json

2017-07-29_DOOMED_TO_FAIL_-_Strafe_Gameplay_[ssxNqBPRL6Y].jpg

2017-07-29_DOOMED_TO_FAIL_-_Strafe_Gameplay_[ssxNqBPRL6Y].webm

DOOMED TO FAIL - Strafe Gameplay

"Thank you all for coming to my private island paradise. In the past, each of you crossed me in some way, yet still agreed to journey here tonight, chasing empty dreams of wealth and power. As you can see from the many heads hung upon these walls, I am an avid and fearless hunter. But these simple beasts no longer quench my blood-lust. I yearn to pursue far more formidable game. Some might call it the most dangerous game. The game known as m-"
"Bears!"
"Wha... no. Ma-"
"Sharks?"
"No! Dammit let m-"
"It's lions guys. Kings of the jung-"
"Hippos kill more people than anything."
"Please let me fi-"
"How would he get a hippo on this island?"
"I read about this spider in Australia tha-"
"Forget it. I'm going to bed. The boat leaves in 20. Do please be on it."

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2017-07-29_CUTTHROAT_ISLAND_-_Gmod_Murder_Gameplay_Part_1_[fo8HqxNeOyo].description

2017-07-29_CUTTHROAT_ISLAND_-_Gmod_Murder_Gameplay_Part_1_[fo8HqxNeOyo].info.json

2017-07-29_CUTTHROAT_ISLAND_-_Gmod_Murder_Gameplay_Part_1_[fo8HqxNeOyo].jpg

2017-07-29_CUTTHROAT_ISLAND_-_Gmod_Murder_Gameplay_Part_1_[fo8HqxNeOyo].webm

CUTTHROAT ISLAND - Gmod Murder Gameplay Part 1

If you ever meet Steven Suptic, whatever you do, do NOT attempt to give him a hug. Not only is he disgusted by human contact, but I tried it once and his ribs crumbled like a handful of Pringles.  

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2017-07-28_HACKING_IS_COOL_-_Funhaus_Comments_81_[MY-2E2DGjTE].description

2017-07-28_HACKING_IS_COOL_-_Funhaus_Comments_81_[MY-2E2DGjTE].info.json

2017-07-28_HACKING_IS_COOL_-_Funhaus_Comments_81_[MY-2E2DGjTE].jpg

2017-07-28_HACKING_IS_COOL_-_Funhaus_Comments_81_[MY-2E2DGjTE].webm

HACKING IS COOL? - Funhaus Comments #81