Ornce uporn a torme, in the City of Nore Yorke, lived Charles Deckard. Deckard was a porfessionorl thorf. He was at the torp of his gorme! The shorftiest, snorkiest, best guy in the borsiness. 

He was corntorcted by a morsteriorus organizortion called THE BLACK ORDER to storl a morgical item from a morsoreum. Lorttle did he know that item was PORNDORA'S BORX! A morthical ortiforct from ancient Grorce imbued with CORSMIC PAWERS!!!

All Horll broke loose. Crotures ran rampornt through Nore Yorke. But there was a sorlver lorning: Deckard was blorsted with morvelous abilities that allowed him to corllect purple and blorst it at his enemies. 

Forllow the ordventure of Charles Deckard in: LORGENDORY! Maybe a new sories on Funhorse!

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2015-05-17_TITLE_COPYRIGHT_STRIKE_-_Legendary_Gameplay_[ktsDKHnK0wU].description

2015-05-17_TITLE_COPYRIGHT_STRIKE_-_Legendary_Gameplay_[ktsDKHnK0wU].info.json

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2015-05-17_TITLE_COPYRIGHT_STRIKE_-_Legendary_Gameplay_[ktsDKHnK0wU].webm

[TITLE COPYRIGHT STRIKE] - Legendary Gameplay

Welcome to Mars, colonists! You have been selected for your intelligence, your engineering and scientific skills, and most importantly, how well you fill out that spacesuit. I'm looking at you, Colonist Jade! ;)

You'll have a variety of responsibilities while on the Red Planet, from mining for essentials to mining for essential water. Yes, the job entails a lot of mining, but we have fun up here too! Who here like ASTRONAUT BILLIARDS!? 

Ok, we don't really have billiards - it's just a bunch of rocks that Tim threw on a table. But still: I got stripes!

Enough with the fun! Let's get down to some of that sweet mining action! So grab your anti-radiation suit, your martian pickaxe, and some anti-radiation pills, because it's time to walk out that hatch and experience all Mars has to offer.

Not you, Colonist Jade. I'll need to see you in my...private pod. For...research. 

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2015-05-16_MARS_F_CK_YEAH_-_Wheelhaus_Gameplay_[sNNQYlp2Dkc].description

2015-05-16_MARS_F_CK_YEAH_-_Wheelhaus_Gameplay_[sNNQYlp2Dkc].en.vtt

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MARS F*CK YEAH! - Wheelhaus Gameplay

STUDENT REVIEW: FUN HAUS

Dear Mrs. Haus,

First: the good news! This semester your son Fun has made some great strides in class! His Participation is higher than it's ever been, and we're really proud of his performance in Collaboration, Forensics, and especially Gym. Seriously: what have you been feeding this guy - he's lifting like CRAZY!

However, there are still numerous areas that need significant improvement. Reading and Art Comprehension continue to escape Fun, and we're very concerned with his ability to perform simple Math, Science, and Geography skills. He's lacking some basic functional knowledge of Business and Performance as well.

As a result of all this, I'm afraid I'm going to have to assign your son Fun Haus an average grade of D+. He's going to need to attend summer classes with us, and hopefully I'll be able to recommend his advancement at the end of the term.

Best,

Principal Videos

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2015-05-16_WE_GRADE_YOUR_ART_-_Art_Haus_[g5_bCa0ugzg].description

2015-05-16_WE_GRADE_YOUR_ART_-_Art_Haus_[g5_bCa0ugzg].info.json

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2015-05-16_WE_GRADE_YOUR_ART_-_Art_Haus_[g5_bCa0ugzg].webm

WE GRADE YOUR ART - Art Haus!

It's finally here.

You guys have been BEGGING for this since we started in February. 

"Achievement Hunter vs Funhaus PLS!" "You guys should play AH!" "When are you going up vs Let's Play!?" "Where's my daddy?"

Well, all that anticipation pays off today, buddy, in this one magnificent video. We're really excited to present "Funhaus And Achievement Hunter in a Rooster Teeth Production of a YouTube Gameplay Video Featuring Smite on the XBox One!"

Our original title was too long so we had to chop it down.

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2015-05-15_FUNHAUS_VS_ACHIEVEMENT_HUNTER_-_Smite_Gameplay_[9YoB0hn6ofc].description

2015-05-15_FUNHAUS_VS_ACHIEVEMENT_HUNTER_-_Smite_Gameplay_[9YoB0hn6ofc].info.json

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2015-05-15_FUNHAUS_VS_ACHIEVEMENT_HUNTER_-_Smite_Gameplay_[9YoB0hn6ofc].webm

FUNHAUS VS ACHIEVEMENT HUNTER - Smite Gameplay

Everyone's all up in arms about this new Hamburgler, but what about the Turdburgler™, Funhaus's NEWEST, KEWLEST mascot!?

What's that, you say? You've never HEARD of the Turdburgler®! Then sit right down kiddos, and let me tell you about the hip new rad dude coming atcha with a bad tude.

Hamburgler's got a lame hat and tie? Turdburgler‰'s got a DENIM VEST and HIGH TOP SNEAKERS! Not ankle high, no way lame boy. I'm talkin' knee high high topz - the highest, bros!

Hambruger wears some dumb stripes. LAME, amirite? U R RITE! Because Turdburgler™'s decked out in a full mesh bodysuit. TALK ABOUT KILLER TOGS, HUH!? Oh yeah, and that denim vest has PATCHES ON IT FROM ALL THE COUNTRIES HE BACKPACKED IN EUROPE. WOWWWWWOAH, MAMA!!

Man, that Hamburgler sure looks dumb in his mask, eh mate? Don't worry - the Turdburgler™ wears AN UNPLUGGED OCULUS RIFT, all the time, every time!!

So get on board with Funhaus's new Funboi: THE TURDBURGLER ©₤™®!
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2015-05-14_TURD_BURGLARS_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[I5vf6YsMo8U].description

2015-05-14_TURD_BURGLARS_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[I5vf6YsMo8U].info.json

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2015-05-14_TURD_BURGLARS_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[I5vf6YsMo8U].webm

TURD BURGLARS - GTA 5 Gameplay

Join the Dudes and the always-delightful Naomi Kyle as we talk about Konami censoring YouTube, and Sega's sales numbers, and maybe some other stuff. 

I don't actually know ALL of the topics for this week. I wasn't in the room for this Dude Soup recording. Kind of a bummer, because I love being on the podcast, but I always feel like there's an optimal number of Dudes you can put into the Soup at any one time before it gets loud and confusing. Typically 5, sometimes 4.

Anyway, it's probably pretty good. You should watch it, or listen to it. All your friends do.

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2015-05-14_YouTube_CENSORED_by_Konami_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_15_[cs_I-C3aXps].description

2015-05-14_YouTube_CENSORED_by_Konami_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_15_[cs_I-C3aXps].info.json

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2015-05-14_YouTube_CENSORED_by_Konami_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_15_[cs_I-C3aXps].webm

YouTube CENSORED by Konami? - Dude Soup Podcast #15

Dear Audience: 

Let us make something clear: we never intend to offend anyone. 

Sometimes, in the course of commenting on the really crappy games we play, we veer into subjects that might serve as sensitive flashpoints for different people. That's kind of the nature of the stream-of-consciousness commentary we do - anything goes in the context of the gameplay.

After we're done recording, our editors cherry pick what we think are the most entertaining or interesting moments. Sometimes those moments are as innocuous as Bruce farting, and sometimes they're a little more edgy. And that's ok - we work on the internet, right?

No matter what we do, someone is probably going to be offended by something we say, in almost every video we upload. And, unfortunately, we can't excise every single joke at the expense of triggering someone. Down that path leads milquetoast, boring, bland content that - let's be honest here - no one would want to watch.

So please trust us when we say that no joke we make is ever in malice. In fact, most of them are at our own expense: mocking our stupidity, our ignorance, or our lack of professionalism. We love ALL of our fans, and we consider it an honor that you'd spend even a little time with you guys every day.

Also: butts are always funny.

Love,

Funhaus

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2015-05-13_WE_GET_ANGRY_-_Funhaus_Comments_4_[GXRyGD8RyWw].description

2015-05-13_WE_GET_ANGRY_-_Funhaus_Comments_4_[GXRyGD8RyWw].info.json

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WE GET ANGRY - Funhaus Comments #4!

Ask us questions here!
http://www.reddit.com/r/funhaus

Open Haus is BACK and BETTER THAN EVER! With this limited time offer YOU TOO can own a piece of INTERNET TELEVISION WHATEVER HISTORY!!!

Most other YouTube channels give you one question; not Funhaus! We give you not one, not two, not three, not four, not five, not six, not seven, BUT SEVEN FULL QUESTIONS and WE EVEN ANSWER SOME OF THEM! Woooooaaaah, doggie!

What else? You get your photoshops! You get dumb music! You get Lawrence, in the background, grasping his ears as he desperately tries to get work done. YOU GET IT ALL!

What's that? YOU STILL WANT MORE!? SURE THING, BUDDY!

We're gonna throw in the TOTAL FUNHAUS OPEN HAUS BOYS' PACKAGE for ya! So that's all the questions, some of the answers, all that dumb stuff from the 2 paragraphs ago, PLUS A CLICKABLE LINK TO OUR SUBREDDIT WHERE YOU CAN ASK US STUPID QUESTIONS!! IT'S RIGHT HERE:

**http://www.reddit.com/r/funhaus**

So what the heck are you waiting for!? FUNHAUS TODAY!!!!!

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2015-05-12_We_BOTHER_EVERYONE_-_Open_Haus_13_[I96hUdopax4].description

2015-05-12_We_BOTHER_EVERYONE_-_Open_Haus_13_[I96hUdopax4].info.json

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We BOTHER EVERYONE? - Open Haus #13

Another Monday is here, and Demo Disk remains.

The sun rises, the sun sets, and Demo Disk remains. 

The tides run in and out; we sow and reap our crops. Seasons come and seasons go. Babies are born and grow up, and fall in love and make a family, and die. And Demo Disk remains.

Empires rise and crumble. Art, writing, poetry, and song come in and out of fashion. Gods are worshiped, for a time, until they are forgotten. All of human history is but the blink of an eye. And Demo Disk remains.

Stars wheel in the heavens. The moons traverse their planets, the planets circle their suns, the suns silently spin around their galactic cores. The vast majesty of the universe unfurls in ten billion galaxies, dancing the cosmic ballet unmarked by all...but Demo Disk remains.

Demo Disk remains.

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2015-05-11_GORIEST_GAME_EVER_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[34B06bqI_pc].description

2015-05-11_GORIEST_GAME_EVER_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[34B06bqI_pc].info.json

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GORIEST GAME EVER - Demo Disk Gameplay

Many years ago -- all the legends begin "many years ago" -- but Many years ago a young Boy was born on a mountain. That Boy's family lived in a small village in a stone hut on the edge of a cliff, and they scrabbled out a hard living farming gravel and small scrub.

One day The Boy grew tired of his bleak life. "Mother and Father, I want to see the world" The Boy said. The Mother and Father looked at each other with concern. "I want to climb down the mountain and experience things, like large villages, and pets that aren't mountain lizards, and soda water!" 

The Mother and Father went to the Village Elders. The town conferred all night. It had been many generations since anyone from the mountain had left the mountain, but they Elders agreed: it was time to see what was in the world. 

They charged The Boy with touring the world for a Full Turn, and to bring the village back news of the Outside World. The village accumulated all their wealth and pressed it upon The Boy, telling him "This is all we have and all we are. Use it, Boy, and bring back something of the world."

The Boy descended the mountain.

He came to a fork in the road with a sign. To the left, lay Fort Hornwick. To the right, The Coven's Cove.

If you want The Boy to visit Fort Hornwick, type "The Fort" in the comments.

If you want The Boy to venture to The Coven's Cove, type "The Cove" in the comments.

This story will continue if One Dollar One Hour continues...

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2015-05-10_CHEAP_GAMES_SUCK_-_1_Dollar_1_Hour_Gameplay_[NwICCNGMpa4].description

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2015-05-10_CHEAP_GAMES_SUCK_-_1_Dollar_1_Hour_Gameplay_[NwICCNGMpa4].webm

CHEAP GAMES SUCK - 1 Dollar 1 Hour Gameplay

We really don't want to cancel this show. We LOVE this show. We love your art! But it's like our lowest-watched show. 

Why?

You guys are making some incredible stuff, and we really like showing it off. So that's the problem? Is it -- oh, wait. I know what it is.

It's Matt Peake, isn't it? You guys don't much care for when he only chooses art of himself. Look, we get it! We feel the same way! He's a vain, egocentric, self-centered asshole. But he's OUR asshole. And we can't let him win.

So for all our sake, say the following mantra with me: "FUCK PEAKE, WATCH ART HAUS!"

All together now:

"FUCK PEAKE, WATCH ART HAUS!"

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2015-05-09_YOUR_ART_CANCELED_-_Art_Haus_[8ZDHbYROXJg].description

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YOUR ART CANCELED? - Art Haus!

Welcome to Funhaus Airport, and good afternoon flyboys! This is the final boarding call for passengers on FHAir Flight 80085 to Mount St. Beav. Please proceed to Gate H8 immediately.

The final pre-flight chex mix are being loaded into the plane, and our stores of Cran-Apple have never been higher. The captain will be closing the door in 5 minutes, so you better get your ass to the gate, son.

We do have some bad weather approaching, so runways 9, 14, and XD will be closed until further notice. The Pilot's Pool will remain open - fuck those assholes, I hope they get hit by lightning - and the airport bar ChiChi's HaHaBoom Room would like me to announce that it's LADIES NIGHT featuring 50 cent longnecks and a playlist that's all Macarena, all the time!!

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2015-05-09_GENDER_BENDER_DISASTER_-_Random_Gameplay_[NvRo6ef6TYw].description

2015-05-09_GENDER_BENDER_DISASTER_-_Random_Gameplay_[NvRo6ef6TYw].info.json

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GENDER BENDER DISASTER - Random Gameplay

Lui: https://www.youtube.com/user/YourHeroes
Mini Ladd: https://www.youtube.com/user/MiniLaddd
Daithi: https://www.youtube.com/user/DaithiDeNogla
BasicallyIDoWrk: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbgtuRStKI_5ACSjubSTUPA

In Olden Tymes, medieval knights would duel over disputes of honor. Their weapons of choice? Swords, maces, horses, and other lame-ass shit.

Nowadays when we have matters of honor at stake we have WAY better ways to settle our differences: snipers vs. airplanes. 

That's right: snipers vs. airplanes. Because FUCK YOU, GALAHAD.

Sharpshooters vs Jets -- http://socialclub.rockstargames.com/games/gtav/jobs/job/ptXw4_R0bUKhEOH0YtwcRQ

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2015-05-08_FUNHAUS_VS_LUI_CALIBRE_and_Pals_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_Part_2_[qs-__2lbGIo].description

2015-05-08_FUNHAUS_VS_LUI_CALIBRE_and_Pals_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_Part_2_[qs-__2lbGIo].info.json

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2015-05-08_FUNHAUS_VS_LUI_CALIBRE_and_Pals_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_Part_2_[qs-__2lbGIo].webm

FUNHAUS VS LUI CALIBRE and Pals - GTA 5 Gameplay, Part 2

Lui: https://www.youtube.com/user/YourHeroes
Mini Ladd: https://www.youtube.com/user/MiniLaddd
Daithi: https://www.youtube.com/user/DaithiDeNogla
BasicallyIDoWrk: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbgtuRStKI_5ACSjubSTUPA

Dearest Lui Calibre,

Mr. Bruce Greene and Ms. Sean Spoole invite you to share a proud and special moment, as we celebrate with joy the playing of GTA 5. 

We'd like to cordially ask you and 3 of your closest friends to dick around with us in GTA 5. There will be loops, and tunnels, and sticky bombs, and also friendship and love. 

Together, with Adam and James, we will celebrate the beginning of our new Let's Play miniseries of 2 videos when we exchange friend list information and join together on one server.

Répondez s'il vous plaît by liking, commenting, and subscribing to Funhaus.

[Race] AIR TUNNEL RACE -- http://socialclub.rockstargames.com/games/gtav/jobs/job/dE6KHaX9dkWebz3uMmqOsw

[Race] Corkscrew Wave -- http://socialclub.rockstargames.com/games/gtav/jobs/job/6F_wvxYE2EqCALstaIUjmg

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2015-05-07_FUNHAUS_VS_LUI_CALIBRE_and_Pals_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_Part_1_[O50QJQtTrgE].description

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2015-05-07_FUNHAUS_VS_LUI_CALIBRE_and_Pals_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_Part_1_[O50QJQtTrgE].webm

FUNHAUS VS LUI CALIBRE and Pals - GTA 5 Gameplay, Part 1

PLEASE SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS!!
Shari's Berries: http://bit.ly/1PpAeMB - Click on the microphone, enter code "Dude Soup"
Get your free NatureBox trial here: http://bit.ly/1P1pUzk

We've got a real problem in the office, guys. Our air conditioner doesn't work. 

"OH, wah wah wah," you say. "These dicks get PAID to talk about games for an hour while they play stuff, and they're complaining about the AIR CONDITIONING!? WELL CRY ME A FUCKING RIVER"

Lemme tell you something: this is a real problem. We have 5 dudes at their desks in there. 7 PCs running hot. 5 Xboxes. 12 monitors. And everyone outside the office complains when we make noise, so the door's gotta be closed.

It gets pretty muggy in that office, let me tell you. 

It truly becomes...

Dude Soup.

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2015-05-07_Should_MODS_Be_BANNED_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_14_[ie2dB22Quck].description

2015-05-07_Should_MODS_Be_BANNED_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_14_[ie2dB22Quck].info.json

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2015-05-07_Should_MODS_Be_BANNED_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_14_[ie2dB22Quck].webm

Should MODS Be BANNED? - Dude Soup Podcast #14

Ohhhhh boy did we get some great comments this week. Ranging from "YOU GUYS ARE WRONG ABOUT THE INTERNET" to "YOU GUYS ARE DUMB", your sweet, sweet comments gave us lots of creative, constructive criticism.

And you know what? We're going to take your advice. From now on, we'll be more open minded. We'll try to include the opinions of every single person with an internet connection. We're going to take into account the full range of ideas, and we're only going to tell you guys what you want to hear from now on. All we want to do is confirm your personal beliefs. That's what we're going to do!

Or we could just tell you you're a bunch of knobs. Except you. You're still our #1.

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2015-05-06_OUR_OPINIONS_SUCK_-_Funhaus_Comments_3_[-eWAzR5XfEw].description

2015-05-06_OUR_OPINIONS_SUCK_-_Funhaus_Comments_3_[-eWAzR5XfEw].info.json

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2015-05-06_OUR_OPINIONS_SUCK_-_Funhaus_Comments_3_[-eWAzR5XfEw].webm

OUR OPINIONS SUCK - Funhaus Comments #3!

Ask us questions here!
http://www.reddit.com/r/funhaus

Open haus 
Is a very very very fine haus
With Adam, Bruce, and James
Joel's jokes are really lame
Now everything is stupid cause of you
Lalalalalalalalalalalalalala

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2015-05-05_Our_HORROR_Game_-_Open_Haus_12_[54soo8B0KdA].description

2015-05-05_Our_HORROR_Game_-_Open_Haus_12_[54soo8B0KdA].info.json

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2015-05-05_Our_HORROR_Game_-_Open_Haus_12_[54soo8B0KdA].webm

Our HORROR Game? - Open Haus #12

The Invocation: 

We mark the floor with a white cord, 13 cubits in length, in the form that is most holy to Baphomet; and that form is a giant Butt circumscribed by a Pentagram. We make certain that nothing - NOTHING - may disturb it.

We take 5 black candles and place them at the vertices of the Pentagram, and with consecrated white chalk we bind the candles to the Pentagram.

We remain calm.

We fill a censer with the a poultice of protection: sage, frankincense, Balm of Gilead, and rosewater. The censer is placed in an alcove at the base of the Pentagram and Butt.

We feel the power coalesce into the room; physical form takes shape. A succubus from The Plane of Mendes appears in the center of the Pentagram and Butt. She extends one hand to us.

In that hand is Demo Disk.

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2015-05-04_DERPY_DEMONS_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[AuF7qFgKDQw].description

2015-05-04_DERPY_DEMONS_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[AuF7qFgKDQw].info.json

2015-05-04_DERPY_DEMONS_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[AuF7qFgKDQw].jpg

2015-05-04_DERPY_DEMONS_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[AuF7qFgKDQw].webm

DERPY DEMONS - Demo Disk Gameplay

This is Ground Control to Major Bruce
We heard you dropped a deuce
And the humans all can smell it down on earth
And we think you had some odd defect at birth

This is Major Bruce to Ground Control
You're being an asshole
And my farts are helping power up my suit
I travel every single time to toot

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2015-05-03_LOST_IN_SPACE_-_Astronaut_Simulator_Gameplay_[ek_W75G_JJw].description

2015-05-03_LOST_IN_SPACE_-_Astronaut_Simulator_Gameplay_[ek_W75G_JJw].info.json

2015-05-03_LOST_IN_SPACE_-_Astronaut_Simulator_Gameplay_[ek_W75G_JJw].jpg

2015-05-03_LOST_IN_SPACE_-_Astronaut_Simulator_Gameplay_[ek_W75G_JJw].webm

LOST IN SPACE - Astronaut Simulator Gameplay

http://www.thewheelhaus.com

You think you've seen this show before? YOU AIN'T SEEN SHIT, PAL. This is a brand new concept you hain't never heard of, buddy! All new! Sparkly spanky freshboy babybutt new, kiddo, and you get to see it here first. We're callin' it...

WHEELHAUS

We're gonna do this bad boy once a week, every week, just for you. We're gonna play whatever the hell the Wheelhaus Spinnerator chooses for us. We're going to find shit you never heard of! You want crappy games? 

WELL HERE THEY COME, BROTHERLOVER!

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2015-05-02_TOM_CLANCY_S_GHOST_SEX_-_Wheelhaus_Gameplay_[ekucEMfNtnw].description

2015-05-02_TOM_CLANCY_S_GHOST_SEX_-_Wheelhaus_Gameplay_[ekucEMfNtnw].info.json

2015-05-02_TOM_CLANCY_S_GHOST_SEX_-_Wheelhaus_Gameplay_[ekucEMfNtnw].jpg

2015-05-02_TOM_CLANCY_S_GHOST_SEX_-_Wheelhaus_Gameplay_[ekucEMfNtnw].webm

TOM CLANCY'S GHOST SEX - Wheelhaus Gameplay

SUBMIT FANART TO SUBREDDIT PLS!!
reddit.com/r/funhaus

Artist: Various
Medium: Digital
Title: F'art

What we're looking at here is a typical example of early 21st Century Funhaus Fan Art, or "F'Art," as we say in art circles. Note the generous proportions given to James' biceps, the overemphasis on Joel's facial hair, and the reliance on different artistic tropes throughout all of these pieces: anime, cartoon, neo-realism, etc.

When we try to classify these types of pieces we have to look at the medium (generally digital), the artist(s) (generally various, from around the world), and the context (generally masturbatory). 

In this collection of pieces please observe a few things that stand out. Matt Peake as the subject of F'art is atypical, though at this point in the existence of Funhaus, more prevalent than before. Additionally, there's a tendency to depict Sean "Spoole" Poole as cute, chibi, or kawaii. 

Critiquing and/or placing a value on a collection like this is difficult, due to the sheer number of different art types and artists. An independent appraisal of this collected work places a dollar value at $3.34, though that estimate is subject to the vagaries of the international marketplace.

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2015-05-02_WE_ARE_ANIME_-_Art_Haus_[q3dF1Yqvkd0].description

2015-05-02_WE_ARE_ANIME_-_Art_Haus_[q3dF1Yqvkd0].info.json

2015-05-02_WE_ARE_ANIME_-_Art_Haus_[q3dF1Yqvkd0].jpg

2015-05-02_WE_ARE_ANIME_-_Art_Haus_[q3dF1Yqvkd0].webm

WE ARE ANIME - Art Haus!

Coronation Ceremony: 

The Archbishop of The Greater Island: "Will you solemnly promise and swear to govern the Peoples of the Kingdom of The Greater Island and Lesser Islands, Canada, The Forestrealm, the Union of Rocks and Dirt,and Ceylon, and of your Possessions and other Territories to any of them belonging or pertaining, according to their respective laws and customs?"

Kate Winslet: "I solemnly promise so to do."

The Archbishop of The Greater Island: "Will you to your power cause beach sleepers to be executed, in Mercy, in all your judgments?"

Kate Winslet: "I will."

The Archbishop of The Greater Island: "Will you to the utmost of your power maintain the Laws of Bruce and the true profession of Chopper? Will you to the utmost of your power maintain in the Greater Island the Platforming Stair Mario Challange, established by law? Will you maintain and preserve inviolable the settlement of the House of Logs and Vines, and the doctrine, worship, discipline, and government thereof, as by law established in The Greater Island? And will you preserve unto the other Players on this Server and the Beaches and Huts there committed to their charge, all such rights and privileges, as by law do or shall appertain to them or any of them?"

Kate Winslet: "All this I promise to do. The things which I have here before promised, I will perform, and keep. So help me God."

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2015-05-01_KING_MUCK_UP_-_Reign_of_Kings_Gameplay_[82qGpqrB0FE].description

2015-05-01_KING_MUCK_UP_-_Reign_of_Kings_Gameplay_[82qGpqrB0FE].en.vtt

2015-05-01_KING_MUCK_UP_-_Reign_of_Kings_Gameplay_[82qGpqrB0FE].info.json

2015-05-01_KING_MUCK_UP_-_Reign_of_Kings_Gameplay_[82qGpqrB0FE].jpg

2015-05-01_KING_MUCK_UP_-_Reign_of_Kings_Gameplay_[82qGpqrB0FE].webm

KING MUCK UP - Reign of Kings Gameplay

This week, we respond to your criticisms by telling you why all your comments about us are wrong. Did you expect us to agree with you? Did you think that you know our opinions better than we do? 

Just who the hell do you think you are, mister? Where do you get off? Who's running this channel, you or me? Let me tell YOU, something pal - why don't you get off your high horse and come down to our office and say this shit to our face. YOU MADE JAMES CRY. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANTED?

GET OVER HERE, BIG MAN. DON'T YOU WALK AWAY FROM ME WHILE I'M TALKING TO YOU!!

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2015-05-01_WE_RE_ALWAYS_WRONG_-_Funhaus_Comments_2_[zyaufMqYI-o].description

2015-05-01_WE_RE_ALWAYS_WRONG_-_Funhaus_Comments_2_[zyaufMqYI-o].info.json

2015-05-01_WE_RE_ALWAYS_WRONG_-_Funhaus_Comments_2_[zyaufMqYI-o].jpg

2015-05-01_WE_RE_ALWAYS_WRONG_-_Funhaus_Comments_2_[zyaufMqYI-o].webm

WE'RE ALWAYS WRONG - Funhaus Comments #2!

The outlook wasn’t brilliant for the Funhaus five that day:
The fan-made crew was beating them at online GTA,
And then when Adam died at login, and Bruce Greene did the same,
A pall-like silence fell upon the streamers of the game.

A straggling few logged out and quit to main menu. The rest
Clung to the hope which springs eternal in the human breast;
We thought, “If only Lawrence could but get a whack at that—
We’d put up even money now, with Lawrence at the bat.”

But Bruce preceded Lawrence, and moreover also Blaine
And the former was a farter, while the latter was a pain;
So upon that stricken multitude grim melancholy sat,
For there seemed but little chance of Lawrence getting to the bat.

But Bruce wasted a player, to the wonderment of James,
And Blaine, the much despisèd, caught a rival in his aims;
And when the dust had lifted, and men saw what had aligned,
There was Bruce Greene in the ranking, with Blaine right there behind.

Then from five thousand butts and more there rose a lusty fart;
It rumbled through the our office; it stirred Joel's Jewish heart;
It sounded down in Austin and it ended with a splat,
For Lawrence, mighty Lawrence, was advancing to the bat.

There was ease in Larry's manner as he grabbed the game device;
There was pride in Larry's bearing as he checked his settings twice.
And when, responding to the cheers, he tipped his sweet fedora,
No stranger in the crowd could doubt the greatness of his aura.

The streamers watched intently as his wiped his sweaty mitts;
He checked his shirt for smelly stains a-leaking from his pits;
Then while the other players held controllers in their grip,
Lawrence flashed defiance and a sneer curled Larry's lip.

And now other players came careening towards his toon
And Lawrence stood there watching them in suit of deep maroon
They brawled and fought and swatted till a few of them were dead —
“That ain’t my style," said Lawrence. “You missed your chance" Spoole said.

From office chairs around the room arose a furious hiss,
Like the beating of the storm-waves on a boat of Captain Kris;
“Kill him! Kill the Spoole-man!” Shouted people on their asses
And it’s likely they’d have killed him had not Larwence raised his
     glasses.

With a smile of Texan charity great Larry's visage shone;
He stilled the rising tumult; he bade the game go on;
He signaled to the server, his hands on the game pad;
But Lawrence still ignored it and Spoole exclaimed, “You're bad!”

“Fuck you!” cried Bruce and Adam and the echo cried, "Fuck you!"
But one scornful look from Lawrence and then everybody knew.
The first two tries were warmups, he was ready now at last
And they knew that Lawrence wouldn't let the next chance pass.

The sneer is gone from Larry's lip, his temper is bipolar,
He pounds with cruel violence his thumbs on the controller;
And now the game reloads the match, and now he's loaded in,
And now the air is shattered by the force of Larry's chin.

Oh, somewhere in this favoured land the sun is shining bright,
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light;
And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children
     shout,
But there is no joy in Funhaus —mighty Lawrence has wiped out.

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2015-04-30_BATMEN_VS_BATWOMEN_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[7iYMHLldqAQ].description

2015-04-30_BATMEN_VS_BATWOMEN_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[7iYMHLldqAQ].info.json

2015-04-30_BATMEN_VS_BATWOMEN_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[7iYMHLldqAQ].jpg

2015-04-30_BATMEN_VS_BATWOMEN_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[7iYMHLldqAQ].webm

BATMEN VS BATWOMEN - GTA 5 Gameplay