*ring...ring...ring...ring...ri-
"Mmmph h-hullo?"
"Hey, Wes. Its me again."
"Wha- Skeet? Jesus, what time is it?"
"I dunno, I'm pretty railed right now. Me, Matt and Jamie just did a pile of blow and cranked out a script for "Scream 5: The Revenge of Billy Loomis". Wanna take a look at it?"
"You know I've been dead for like two years now, right?"
"We could even put a five where the S should be, y'know."
"How did you even get this number?"
(muffled) "Yeah, Matt, I just told him about the five thing! Shut up! I think he's into it."
*click
"Hello? Wes? Sh*t... How the hell do you even pronounce '5cream' anyways?"

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2017-10-15_SCREAM_QUEENS_-_Gmod_Slashers_Gameplay_with_Sark_[J76ChWJ0LRE].description

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SCREAM QUEENS - Gmod Slashers Gameplay with Sark

Damn! Super hot chicks walking around in their bikinis, demon invocations, and orgies?!
If life in Russia is this cool maybe we should let them decide ALL of our elections.
*this joke brought to you courtesy of your middle-aged uncle who's the funniest guy at his office's weekly Applebee's happy hour.

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2017-10-15_DEMON_SEED_-_Strangers_in_a_Strange_Land_Gameplay_Part_2_of_2_[vPyD4h43BS8].description

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DEMON SEED - Strangers in a Strange Land Gameplay (Part 2 of 2)

I hate to say it guys, but I'm running dangerously low on stupid golf gags for these titles. What's left? DRIVING ME CRAZY? CRAPPY GILMORE? Hand to god, I almost called this one WHO'S YOUR CADDY. Maya Angelou would be struggling to come up with a good "hole" pun at this point. And she practically invented them.

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2017-10-14_TEE_PARTY_-_Everybody_s_Golf_Gameplay_with_Joel_[TEQcCQUxvG0].description

2017-10-14_TEE_PARTY_-_Everybody_s_Golf_Gameplay_with_Joel_[TEQcCQUxvG0].info.json

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TEE PARTY - Everybody's Golf Gameplay with Joel

Thank you to Ubisoft for sponsoring this video!
Click here  http://ubi.li/3xsb4  to check out the game for yourself!

You guys
Are my best friends
Through thick and thin
We've always been together
We're four of a kind
Havin' fun all day
Palling around and laughin' away
Just best friends...
Best friends are we!
I love you guys.

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2017-10-13_SUPER_BEST_FRIENDS_-_South_Park_-_The_Fractured_But_Whole_Gameplay_[hojwArteDMQ].description

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SUPER BEST FRIENDS - South Park: The Fractured But Whole Gameplay

I knew a guy in high school who once refused to make out with a girl just because she had recently eaten a pack of Lunchables. In high school, I would have thrown that same girl in front of a bus for just the mini Butterfinger.

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2017-10-13_DANCING_WITH_OURSELVES_-_Funhaus_Comments_92_[n7rAWDoU-aA].description

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DANCING WITH OURSELVES - Funhaus Comments #92

"Hey there lady I just met! Wanna bang in that coffin-sized room that smells like piss and the Cinnabon farts of 200 angry strangers? If we hurry we can get in there before that obese Amway salesman has to throw up again and-"
"Ssshhh... you had me at 'Cinnabon farts'."
And so, The Mile High Club was born.

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2017-10-12_AVENGERS_AIRLINES_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[RWfFQnq2jx0].description

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AVENGERS AIRLINES - GTA 5 Gameplay

This is my description. There are many others like it, but this one is mine. My description is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. Without me, my description is useless. Without my description, I am useless. I must write my description true. I must write funnier than Jacob, who is trying to replace me. I will. Before God I swear this creed: my description and myself are defenders of Funhaus. So be it, until there is no internet. Amen.

GTA Battlefield - https://socialclub.rockstargames.com/games/gtav/pc/jobs/job/KceqJpu-Xku4Y633G2uqQQ#

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2017-10-12_FULL_METAL_JACK_IT_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[fnPjz3LaYc4].description

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FULL METAL JACK IT - GTA 5 Gameplay

Get your first three Blue Apron meals free at http://www.blueapron.com/soup
And get your first Stitch Fix box at http://www.stitchfix.com/dudesoup

This week the whole gang sits down to talk about YouTube's somewhat confusing and hypocritical ad policies as well as:
6:45 - Larr's Movie Club
35:15 - The McDonald's/Rick and Morty sauce debacle
52:00 - James' Tales from the Gym
58:00 - Hard Nettin'

Want more Dude Soup? Check out the Post Show: http://funhaus.roosterteeth.com/show/fan-show

Merch yourself! bit.ly/fhmerch

SOURCES:
[YouTube] LET'S HELP THE VICTIMS OF THE LAS VEGAS ATTACK: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfZvSS_f254
[Twitter] Casey Neistat Video Demonetized: https://twitter.com/CaseyNeistat/status/916012674269429761
[WSJ] ABC Starts Selling Ads Alongside Jimmy Kimmel Clips on YouTube: https://blogs.wsj.com/cmo/2015/09/09/abc-starts-selling-ads-alongside-jimmy-kimmel-clips-on-youtube/

[Twitter] McDonald's Announces Return of Fucking Stupid Sauce: https://twitter.com/McDonalds/status/917169818725384192
[Twitter] Justin Roiland Distances from McDonald's Promo: https://twitter.com/JustinRoiland/status/917145891852623873

HARD NETTIN':
Dyson Show: https://www.youtube.com/user/DysonShow500/

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2017-10-11_BIG_CORPORATIONS_OWN_YOUTUBE_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_143_[xzStR06WKOg].description

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BIG CORPORATIONS OWN YOUTUBE? - Dude Soup Podcast #143

Open Haus is sponsored by Blue Apron! Go to http://www.blueapron.com/openhaus and get your first 3 meals free with free shipping.

Ah, there's Bones. He told me he was going to Boston for the weekend but it turned out he was in Open Haus the whole time! Come back Bones. It's scary without you. It's dark, and there are glass shards in my fingertips. The typing... it hurts...

Ask us questions here!
http://www.reddit.com/r/funhaus

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2017-10-10_OUR_SECRET_TO_SUCCESS_-_Open_Haus_138_[P19qBEaZBvU].description

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OUR SECRET TO SUCCESS? - Open Haus #138

Cool runnings came out in 1993. I came out in 1991. In case you're wondering if I'm Bones or not, it's up to you to learn the truth.

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2017-10-09_BOBSLED_CREAM_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[cqFS5k0m01c].description

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BOBSLED CREAM - Demo Disk Gameplay

Russians have a pretty messed up view of American family life. We only SUBCONSCIOUSLY want to sleep with our mothers and murder our fathers. Crack a book, comrades! 

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2017-10-08_DREAM_MOMMIES_-_Strangers_in_a_Strange_Land_Gameplay_Part_1_of_2_[KGRab0K1uHw].description

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DREAM MOMMIES - Strangers in a Strange Land Gameplay (Part 1 of 2)

This episode of the Movie Podcast is brought to you by Vincero Collective! Go to http://www.vincerocollective.com/filmhaus to get 15% off your very own Vincero watch!

Today the gang talks about the long awaited film, Blade Runner 2049 while I think about how excited I am to go watch it alone with my overbuttered popcorn.

2017-10-08_Blade_Runner_2049_is_the_best_sequel_ever._-_Movie_Podcast_[yccGnw2XoHI].description

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"Blade Runner 2049 is the best sequel ever." - Movie Podcast

"The Insult That Made a Man Out of James"

JAMES: "Hey! Quit kicking sand in our faces!"
ELYSE: "That man is the worst nuisance on the beach."
BRUCE: "Listen here. I'd smash your face... only you're so skinny you might dry up and blow away."
JAMES: "The big bully! I'll get even some day."
ELYSE: "Oh, don't let it bother you, little boy."
JAMES: "Darn it! I'm sick and tired of being a scarecrow! Charles Atlas says he can give me a real body. All right! I'll gamble a stamp and get his free book!
[later at home]
JAMES: "Boy! It didn't take Atlas long to do this for me! What muscles! That bully won't shove me around again!"
[back at the beach]
JAMES: "What you here again? Here's something I owe you!
BRUCE: "Ow!"
ELYSE: "Oh, James, you are a real man after all!"
LAWRENCE: "Gosh! What a build."
ADAM: He's already famous for it!"

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2017-10-08_SLAY_AT_THE_BEACH_-_Gmod_Guess_Who_Gameplay_w_Sark_Part_2_[cfv-Gatujfo].description

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SLAY AT THE BEACH - Gmod Guess Who Gameplay w/Sark Part 2

Thank you to Crytek Studio for sponsoring this gameplay!
Click the link below to check out Warface for yourself!
https://wf.my.com/promo/lvl11/2/en/?_1ld=2455945_2009985&_1lp=1 

The closest I've ever come to active military duty was that one time in 10th grade when I watched "Major Payne" and "Renaissance Man" in the same weekend.  

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2017-10-07_THE_DERP_LOCKER_-_Warface_Gameplay_[ViJO2D7v6RM].description

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THE DERP LOCKER - Warface Gameplay

My awkward phase lasted from about 1989 to 1996. And then again from 2002-2005. Then for most of 2008, about 5 months of 2011, the entire Spring of 2013, and then finally from May of 2015 up until the typing of this sentence.
 
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2017-10-06_OUR_AWKWARD_PHASE_-_Funhaus_Comments_91_[2nsIxiitXvg].description

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OUR AWKWARD PHASE? - Funhaus Comments #91

Do you have any idea how hard it was for me NOT to use a Papa Roach reference in the title for this video? I started to hum the first few bars from "Last Resort" as I typed and Bruce had to tackle me to the ground, kneel on my wrists, and shove an old towel in my mouth until I calmed down.

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2017-10-06_SLUM_LORDS_-_Cockroach_Simulator_Gameplay_[rV_WmvEasEA].description

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SLUM LORDS - Cockroach Simulator Gameplay

"Namor gives off a sense of charisma which most women tend to find captivating. Many of the ladies that have entered his life made clear their attraction to his masculine, slightly alien personality in ways both subtle and blatant. He reacts to such advances with gratitude tinged with a slight distance born of monarchical etiquette."
- Some adult man on Wikipedia whose stepdad keeps tearing down his Namor posters.

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2017-10-05_DEATH_OF_THE_AVENGERS_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[IIW4IoRr-6Y].description

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DEATH OF THE AVENGERS? - GTA 5 Gameplay

I've always hated playing golf. I don't know if it's all the equipment you have to buy, the trudging around in the hot sun, or the memory of my mom beating me nightly with her VHS copy of "Tin Cup".

GTA Kart 3 50cc - https://socialclub.rockstargames.com/games/gtav/pc/jobs/job/oEXE-tltAkWhDIJaX3cSFQ#

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2017-10-05_CART_ATTACK_-_GTA_5_Gameplay_[uHariO8H-i4].description

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CART ATTACK - GTA 5 Gameplay

Get 20% off of your http://www.mackweldon.com order with promo code "dude"
And get a free 7 day Storyblocks trial account at http://www.storyblocks.com/dudesoup.
Thanks to Nintendo for providing us with a SNES Classic!

This week the gang plays a little SNES Classic and talks about its games, features, and shortcomings, as well as:
26:50 - Adam's trip to Halloween Horror Nights and other theme park adventures
49:10 - Games journalism
55:50 - Hard Nettin'

DUDE SOUP POST SHOW!
http://funhaus.roosterteeth.com/show/fan-show

HARD NETTIN'
Dinkster Daily: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYu1rWyr0TxTnHo99oW7ddA/featured

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2017-10-04_SNES_MAKES_US_YOUNG_AGAIN_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_142_[-ifpjL3CUP8].description

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SNES MAKES US YOUNG AGAIN? - Dude Soup Podcast #142

Open Haus is sponsored by Mack Weldon. Go to https://www.mackweldon.com and get 20% off using promo code “OPEN”

Ask us questions here!
http://www.reddit.com/r/funhaus

"In the criminal justice system, sexually based offenses are considered especially heinous. In New York City, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Special Victims Unit. These are their sto- Adam, stop eating that! Jesus. Leave some semen for the boys in the lab."

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2017-10-03_OUR_NEW_MASCOT_-_Open_Haus_137_[lq_Nf2W86AM].description

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OUR NEW MASCOT? - Open Haus #137

You'd all better god-damned appreciate the hell out of "Mothers Be Aware" when the boys finally unlock it. Editing these is taking its toll on poor Daniel. He doesn't eat. He doesn't sleep. The other morning I came into the bungalow and found him standing in the corner like the end of The Blair Witch Project. 

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2017-10-02_MECH_ME_WET_-_Demo_Disk_Gameplay_[YoKlTIhCFwM].description

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MECH ME WET - Demo Disk Gameplay

"Peashe hash cosht you yaw strength. Victory hash derfeated you."
"What?"
"You think daknush ish yaw ally? Thuh shadowsh betray you becaush they belong to me!"
"Did anybody get that? Selena? You guys up in the rafters?"
"I wush wunduring what would break fursht, yur shpirutt ow yur bawdy."
"You're who's buddy? Whatever. Can we move this along? My back's not going to break itself." 

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2017-10-01_THE_HERO_WE_NEED_-_Wheelhaus_Gameplay_[484XcvIOuas].description

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THE HERO WE NEED - Wheelhaus Gameplay

I've never actually broken the law but I did spend the night of my bachelor party as a guest of the La Paz County, Arizona Sheriffs Dept. Quick tip for all you kids out there: If your redneck cousin decides to piss all over the door handles of some other redneck's pickup truck, maybe make yourself scarce for a few hours.  
 
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2017-10-01_BRO_BOTS_-_Lawbreakers_Gameplay_[3Xjs_eccSAk].description

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BRO BOTS - Lawbreakers Gameplay

DISNEY HQ - 9/5/2017 - 10:49 AM 
"Sir, do you read me!? We have a situation down here!"
"What is it? What's Happening? Are those screams?"
"Oh god, he's torn through half my men! And he's... done things to them."
"Who are you talki-"
(muffled) "F**k the tranqs, just take him down!"
"Jenkins! What the hell is going on?!"
"It's Him, Sir! It's Lucas! He found out we need a new director for Episode IX!"
"Dear God."
"He just keeps screaming something about Watto's kids fighting Capt. Panaka's clone or something. It sounds terrible!"
"Jenkins! Whatever you do, do net let him up here for a meeting!"
"I don't know if... oh no. He's seen me. Tell my wife I'm so-aaaaaaggghh....."
"Jenkins! Jenkins, are you there?!"
"..."
"Jenkins?"
"..."
"...George?"
"...Miiiiiii-diiiiiiiii-chlooooriaaaaans."

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2017-09-30_SARK_SIDE_OF_THE_FORCE_-_Gmod_Guess_Who_Gameplay_w_Sark_Part_1_[XzC3_5ZRKuY].description

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SARK SIDE OF THE FORCE - Gmod Guess Who Gameplay w/ Sark Part 1