Use code OPENHAUS for $100 of free delivery credit for your first seven days when you download the Postmates app.

Method actors are just intolerable assholes who have found the perfect cover. If Jared Leto was a sales manager, he'd be sending used condoms and dead rats to Denise in accounting all the time.  

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2019-12-03_Fortnite_Terrors_-_Funhaus_Comments_130_Open_Haus_Edition_[WxzJ_2x5H-E].description

2019-12-03_Fortnite_Terrors_-_Funhaus_Comments_130_Open_Haus_Edition_[WxzJ_2x5H-E].info.json

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2019-12-03_Fortnite_Terrors_-_Funhaus_Comments_130_Open_Haus_Edition_[WxzJ_2x5H-E].webm

Fortnite Terrors - Funhaus Comments #130 (Open Haus Edition)

Do skateboarders still wear baggy jeans and chunky sneakers and threaten to cut off pudgy theater kids' rat-tails outside of the Santa Barbara Public Library, or were those just 90s things? 

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2019-12-02_Skaters_Be_Skatin_-_Worst_Games_Ever_Gameplay_[fd1ZnvrLGPo].description

2019-12-02_Skaters_Be_Skatin_-_Worst_Games_Ever_Gameplay_[fd1ZnvrLGPo].info.json

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2019-12-02_Skaters_Be_Skatin_-_Worst_Games_Ever_Gameplay_[fd1ZnvrLGPo].webm

Skaters Be Skatin' - Worst Games Ever Gameplay

When I was little, my babysitter crammed us into a finished basement and forced us to watch a VHS of Michael Jackson's Thriller video on a loop every single day. Two years of that was still less traumatizing than ten minutes of these whimpering sexless monkey monsters.

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2019-12-01_Belly_of_the_Beast_-_Teletubbies_Funny_Moments_[IEqRaalaPEg].description

2019-12-01_Belly_of_the_Beast_-_Teletubbies_Funny_Moments_[IEqRaalaPEg].info.json

2019-12-01_Belly_of_the_Beast_-_Teletubbies_Funny_Moments_[IEqRaalaPEg].jpg

2019-12-01_Belly_of_the_Beast_-_Teletubbies_Funny_Moments_[IEqRaalaPEg].webm

Belly of the Beast - Teletubbies Funny Moments

Deepest, bluest, my hat is like a shark's fin
Deepest, bluest, my hat is like a shark's fin
Manmade terror
Hungry jaws of death
Y'all don't cross my depths
I'll pause your breaths
I cause you to sink down forty thousand leagues
Bleeding to death with no arms and short sleeves
My world's deep blue
Killers gotta eat too
Looking for human flesh to rip my teeth through
Other fish in the sea but Barracudas ain't equal
To a half-human predator created by a needle
Jet black eyes baby they stare while you sleep
When your Titanic sinks I'm the one you gon' meet
Hearing terrified screams they surround my team
All you see is trails of blood
Even God won't intervene
Nightmares of darkness
My apetite is heartless
Even if we related, you eliminated regardless
In the deep blue, underwater walls
Half man, half shark
My jaws don't fall

Our Father who art in Heaven
Hallowed be Thy name
Killers sworn to beast
Swallowed them in flames
They switched my DNA
Trip me into Cool J
I can't fight the feeling
I'm born to kill prey
To survive an attack
There's only one way
Battle to the death
That's how sharks play
Weapons left behind
We dueling with the mind
You blind, crippled, or crazy
You're real easy to find
Struggling to flow with hemorrhages in your throat
Getting the lap dance while I smash through your boat
Eat your whole fam'
Nothing left but a right hand
Clinging to a rail
Escape, attempts fail
You'll never make it home
Tear the flesh off your bone
Walking in undercurrents is a dangerous zone
I'm talking death out a moment's notice
You wasn't focused
Me and my crew strike
Like some underwater locusts

Uh, uh take it deeper
Uh, uh take it deeper

These waters are waist level
The hallway's flooded
Lost your scuba gear
The killer's cold-blooded
His name's LL
You don't really want it
I ate your ancestors
The ocean is haunted
I'm closing in cause I'm supposed to win
How the cold steel feel when it froze your chin
Should have stayed on dry land
Stroke while you can
Cause now you under pressure in the land of the damned
Abandoned pirate ships
Eels and sod scum
Fish that glow in the dark
The Titanic's hub
Underwater storms
Your blood is so warm
Your life vest is off
And that turns me on
Killer for centuries
The Gotti of the deep
In the next millennium
I'm still gonna creep
Sand under my belly, ocean over my head
Through the light in the shadows
You become the living dead

Yeah, DBS!

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2019-12-01_Dumb_Waders_-_Board_Game_Show_[2_dRyH6dKeI].description

2019-12-01_Dumb_Waders_-_Board_Game_Show_[2_dRyH6dKeI].info.json

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Dumb Waders - Board Game Show

Sorry, Kurt Cobain. Billie Eilish has usurped your crown as the musical artist who gives the least amount of shits. Looks like you got shot in the face by your wife for nothing.

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2019-11-30_Get_Wrecked_-_My_Summer_Car_Gameplay_Part_10_[u7h-JmHgdDI].description

2019-11-30_Get_Wrecked_-_My_Summer_Car_Gameplay_Part_10_[u7h-JmHgdDI].info.json

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2019-11-30_Get_Wrecked_-_My_Summer_Car_Gameplay_Part_10_[u7h-JmHgdDI].webm

Get Wrecked - My Summer Car Gameplay Part 10

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Spoilers start at 20:00.
This week the gang reviews Rian Johnson's fantastic new mystery film Knives Out! Plus a rundown of sequels coming out next year including, Joker 2, Venom 2, and Star Trek 4!

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2019-11-30_Making_Movies_Fun_Again_-_Knives_Out_Review_-_Movie_Podcast_[psZZUekyZ4Y].description

2019-11-30_Making_Movies_Fun_Again_-_Knives_Out_Review_-_Movie_Podcast_[psZZUekyZ4Y].info.json

2019-11-30_Making_Movies_Fun_Again_-_Knives_Out_Review_-_Movie_Podcast_[psZZUekyZ4Y].jpg

2019-11-30_Making_Movies_Fun_Again_-_Knives_Out_Review_-_Movie_Podcast_[psZZUekyZ4Y].webm

Making Movies Fun Again: Knives Out Review - Movie Podcast

Once during a wardrobe fitting on the set of Labyrinth, Jim Henson caught a fleeting glimpse of Bowie's naked junk. Jim realized he would never see anything so beautiful ever again, so he said "Fuck it" and gave himself sepsis.   

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2019-11-29_Testing_Your_Metal_-_Valfaris_Funny_Moments_[HncfnKy9kYY].description

2019-11-29_Testing_Your_Metal_-_Valfaris_Funny_Moments_[HncfnKy9kYY].info.json

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Testing Your Metal - Valfaris Funny Moments

Wait. I think I remember playing Hot Lava as a kid. Is that the game where you throw pillows and stuff on the floor then jump around on the top of all of the furniture until your dad throws a gin bottle at your head and makes you buy stain remover with your allowance?

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2019-11-29_Magma_Cum_Laude_-_Hot_Lava_Gameplay_[dazNdowPLg8].description

2019-11-29_Magma_Cum_Laude_-_Hot_Lava_Gameplay_[dazNdowPLg8].info.json

2019-11-29_Magma_Cum_Laude_-_Hot_Lava_Gameplay_[dazNdowPLg8].jpg

2019-11-29_Magma_Cum_Laude_-_Hot_Lava_Gameplay_[dazNdowPLg8].webm

Magma Cum Laude - Hot Lava Gameplay

Go to http://tipsyelves.com/dude now to get 20% off your entire order!
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This week the gang discusses that weird as hell electric truck thing Elon Musk says we have to buy, their trip to DesignerCon, Papa John going insane, and... this can't be right... more Cats news? God dammit, James.

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2019-11-28_Thankful_For_Cybertrucks_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_254_[GxnQI9uUn8g].description

2019-11-28_Thankful_For_Cybertrucks_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_254_[GxnQI9uUn8g].info.json

2019-11-28_Thankful_For_Cybertrucks_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_254_[GxnQI9uUn8g].jpg

2019-11-28_Thankful_For_Cybertrucks_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_254_[GxnQI9uUn8g].webm

Thankful For Cybertrucks - Dude Soup Podcast #254

The simple act of two imbeciles asking their boss for a raise leads to wackiness, shenanigans, and a light sprinkling of homicide.

Check out the full series only on Rooter Teeth: 
http://roosterteeth.com/episode/arizona-circle-2019-5


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2019-11-27_Weekend_At_Burnie_s_-_Arizona_Circle_Sketch_[BcHaKd1MgDk].description

2019-11-27_Weekend_At_Burnie_s_-_Arizona_Circle_Sketch_[BcHaKd1MgDk].info.json

2019-11-27_Weekend_At_Burnie_s_-_Arizona_Circle_Sketch_[BcHaKd1MgDk].jpg

2019-11-27_Weekend_At_Burnie_s_-_Arizona_Circle_Sketch_[BcHaKd1MgDk].webm

Weekend At Burnie's - Arizona Circle Sketch

I won't be satisfied until we get reboot of "Fresh Prince" in which a de-aged Will Smith plays every single character, including that dumb baby and BOTH Aunt Vivs. 

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2019-11-27_Whack_To_the_Future_-_GTA_5_Funny_Moments_[xpInQk46jBU].description

2019-11-27_Whack_To_the_Future_-_GTA_5_Funny_Moments_[xpInQk46jBU].info.json

2019-11-27_Whack_To_the_Future_-_GTA_5_Funny_Moments_[xpInQk46jBU].jpg

2019-11-27_Whack_To_the_Future_-_GTA_5_Funny_Moments_[xpInQk46jBU].webm

Whack To the Future - GTA 5 Funny Moments

Just go to http://stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the homepage, and type in OPENHAUS to claim your special offer today!

I like my improv comedy like I like my women: fast, loose, and not as nearly as funny as they think they are.
  
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2019-11-26_Whose_Haus_Is_It_Anyway_-_Funhaus_Comments_129_Open_Haus_Edition_[fDQ4DF8tOLM].description

2019-11-26_Whose_Haus_Is_It_Anyway_-_Funhaus_Comments_129_Open_Haus_Edition_[fDQ4DF8tOLM].info.json

2019-11-26_Whose_Haus_Is_It_Anyway_-_Funhaus_Comments_129_Open_Haus_Edition_[fDQ4DF8tOLM].jpg

2019-11-26_Whose_Haus_Is_It_Anyway_-_Funhaus_Comments_129_Open_Haus_Edition_[fDQ4DF8tOLM].webm

Whose Haus Is It Anyway? - Funhaus Comments #129 (Open Haus Edition)

Howie Mandel's lovemaking regimen:
1.Disrobe partner.
2.Hose partner down in shower stall.
3.Dip partner in vat of Purel
4.Politely but firmly ask partner to leave.
5.Beat off to pornography on phone.
6.Toss phone in old timey furnace.
7.Fall asleep on pile of boiled $1000 bills.

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2019-11-25_Teat_Fighter_-_Worst_Games_Ever_Gameplay_[wCzu4pFWEWE].description

2019-11-25_Teat_Fighter_-_Worst_Games_Ever_Gameplay_[wCzu4pFWEWE].info.json

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2019-11-25_Teat_Fighter_-_Worst_Games_Ever_Gameplay_[wCzu4pFWEWE].webm

Teat Fighter - Worst Games Ever Gameplay

I don't remember the Bible having quite so many worm monsters, cursed severed hands, and little sperm-shaped soul demons. But what do I know. I'm a Neo-Pagan. Now, who wants to bang and then burn some dude alive?

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2019-11-24_Let_s_Get_Biblical_-_Board_Game_Show_[GiZg3ZeZZxI].description

2019-11-24_Let_s_Get_Biblical_-_Board_Game_Show_[GiZg3ZeZZxI].info.json

2019-11-24_Let_s_Get_Biblical_-_Board_Game_Show_[GiZg3ZeZZxI].jpg

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Let's Get Biblical - Board Game Show

Well, I guess that's it. With Bruce gone, there's nobody left to keep James from turning this into a Sega Saturn channel. Hope you jerks like Scud: The Disposable Assassin, 'cuz that's all you're getting from now on.

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2019-11-24_Desperate_For_D_-_D_-_The_Game_Funny_Moments_[YAgF_xk6nY0].description

2019-11-24_Desperate_For_D_-_D_-_The_Game_Funny_Moments_[YAgF_xk6nY0].info.json

2019-11-24_Desperate_For_D_-_D_-_The_Game_Funny_Moments_[YAgF_xk6nY0].jpg

2019-11-24_Desperate_For_D_-_D_-_The_Game_Funny_Moments_[YAgF_xk6nY0].webm

Desperate For D - D: The Game Funny Moments

Thanks to LG for sponsoring this video! 
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Sixty bucks for this?! No thanks. I'll just wait a few more years for "Spyro and Crash Bandicoot at the 2023 Santiago Pan Am Games".

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2019-11-23_Medal_Heads_-_Mario_Sonic_at_the_Tokyo_Olympics_2020_Gameplay_[dGv_WD3-64k].description

2019-11-23_Medal_Heads_-_Mario_Sonic_at_the_Tokyo_Olympics_2020_Gameplay_[dGv_WD3-64k].info.json

2019-11-23_Medal_Heads_-_Mario_Sonic_at_the_Tokyo_Olympics_2020_Gameplay_[dGv_WD3-64k].jpg

2019-11-23_Medal_Heads_-_Mario_Sonic_at_the_Tokyo_Olympics_2020_Gameplay_[dGv_WD3-64k].webm

Medal Heads - Mario & Sonic at the Tokyo Olympics 2020 Gameplay

Spoilers start at 18:00
This week the gang reviews the first few episodes of the new Disney+ Star Wars series The Mandalorian, Jacob gushed about Frozen 2, and Adam shares yet another movie theater horror story!

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2019-11-23_Star_Wars_-_The_Mandalorian_Review_-_Movie_Podcast_[kXTZza9_iWA].description

2019-11-23_Star_Wars_-_The_Mandalorian_Review_-_Movie_Podcast_[kXTZza9_iWA].info.json

2019-11-23_Star_Wars_-_The_Mandalorian_Review_-_Movie_Podcast_[kXTZza9_iWA].jpg

2019-11-23_Star_Wars_-_The_Mandalorian_Review_-_Movie_Podcast_[kXTZza9_iWA].webm

Star Wars: The Mandalorian Review - Movie Podcast

When will video games stop stereotyping us Italians as mere plumbers, kart racers, and ghost hunters, and instead pay tribute to our many contributions to the worlds of art, science, and the eating of more a-spicy meat-a-balls before you break-a you Mama's heart!
*(kisses fingers, hops on Vespa, speeds off to mistress' apartment)

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2019-11-22_Good_To_Goo_-_Luigi_s_Mansion_3_Gameplay_[Y_XfJYdcNyM].description

2019-11-22_Good_To_Goo_-_Luigi_s_Mansion_3_Gameplay_[Y_XfJYdcNyM].info.json

2019-11-22_Good_To_Goo_-_Luigi_s_Mansion_3_Gameplay_[Y_XfJYdcNyM].jpg

2019-11-22_Good_To_Goo_-_Luigi_s_Mansion_3_Gameplay_[Y_XfJYdcNyM].webm

Good To Goo - Luigi's Mansion 3 Gameplay

Sorry, kids. Sometimes it's hard to keep up with modern slang. Does "Laying Pipe" mean banging or pooping? Either way, please never tell my daughter this is what I do for a living.

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2019-11-22_Laying_Pipe_-_Human_Fall_Flat_Gameplay_[lUnxzSrO-2E].description

2019-11-22_Laying_Pipe_-_Human_Fall_Flat_Gameplay_[lUnxzSrO-2E].info.json

2019-11-22_Laying_Pipe_-_Human_Fall_Flat_Gameplay_[lUnxzSrO-2E].jpg

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Laying Pipe - Human Fall Flat Gameplay

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In this week's episode we share our thoughts on Star Wars: Jedi Fallen Order, Luigi's Mansion 3, and other recent titles. Plus, we discuss the snubs, upsets, and surprises of the 2019 Game Awards nominations. And we play "Are You the Asshole?"

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2019-11-21_Jedi_Fallen_Order_and_The_Game_Awards_Nominees_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_253_[thDtKRnarEk].description

2019-11-21_Jedi_Fallen_Order_and_The_Game_Awards_Nominees_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_253_[thDtKRnarEk].info.json

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2019-11-21_Jedi_Fallen_Order_and_The_Game_Awards_Nominees_-_Dude_Soup_Podcast_253_[thDtKRnarEk].webm

Jedi Fallen Order and The Game Awards Nominees - Dude Soup Podcast #253

Good news! Disney+ has fully restored that controversial scene from The Little Mermaid. You know the one. It's that part at the very end where King Triton spews a cloud of sperm all over a clutch of eggs then carries them around in his mouth until they mature, and then a torrent of half-developed mermaids erupt into a writhing pile on his lap. Oh, and they brought back the priest's boner or whatever.

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2019-11-20_Seeing_Red_-_GTA_5_Funny_Moments_[c1vtubbGtOg].description

2019-11-20_Seeing_Red_-_GTA_5_Funny_Moments_[c1vtubbGtOg].info.json

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Seeing Red - GTA 5 Funny Moments

Deb and the ladies gather for their book club. This week's pick? The Necronomicon Ex Mortis. 

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2019-11-20_Real_Housewives_of_HELL_-_Arizona_Circle_Sketch_[regxbi9gCYw].description

2019-11-20_Real_Housewives_of_HELL_-_Arizona_Circle_Sketch_[regxbi9gCYw].info.json

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2019-11-20_Real_Housewives_of_HELL_-_Arizona_Circle_Sketch_[regxbi9gCYw].webm

Real Housewives of HELL - Arizona Circle Sketch

Head over to http://mugsy.com and use code OPENHAUS for 10% off!
Check out the full episodes of Arizona Circle only on Rooter Teeth:
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Stop making fun of Jacob's hair! If you spent the past twenty-five years sleeping in toddler bed shaped like an X-Wing your head would be all mashed too!   

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2019-11-19_Arizona_Circle_Jerks_-_Funhaus_Comments_128_Open_Haus_Edition_[vTWSY3Hh9qI].description

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Arizona Circle Jerks - Funhaus Comments #128 (Open Haus Edition)

Despite what you may have heard, Jeanette from the Chippettes was NOT my very first crush. Crush is such a childish word. What we have goes so much deeper than that.

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2019-11-18_Munk_in_the_Trunk_-_Worst_Games_Ever_Gameplay_[SbH42QJpIjU].description

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'Munk in the Trunk - Worst Games Ever Gameplay